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Barnacle Session

Barnacle Session published on No Comments on Barnacle Session

DR. FROMM:  Ralph, your separation issues, in part, stem from your father walking out on the family when you were six… but mainly because… you’re a barnacle.

RALPH:  I disagree, what are you talking about?

DR: FROMM:  You’re in denial, Ralph.

RALPH:  I’m in your office, Dr. Fromm.

DR. FROMM:  What?  I know you’re in my office.  Why did you say that?

RALPH:  I’m in your office Dr. Fromm- I said that.

DR. FROMM:  I know, that’s why I’m asking you why did you say you were in my office?

RALPH:  Because I am, Dr. Fromm.  I mean- you are Dr. Fromm, and I am in your office.

DR. FROMM:  Never mind, let’s move on.

RALPH:  I think not.

DR. FROMM:  I think we should move on.

RALPH:  No.

DR. FROMM:  Ralph, we need to let this go.

RALPH:  I can’t.

DR. FROMM:  You see, Ralph… it’s the barnacle in you.

RALPH:  I disagree.

DR. FROMM:  You’re in denial!

RALPH:  I’m in your office!

DR. FROMM:  You can’t let anything go, Ralph.  That is the reason why all of your exes have filed restraining orders against you.

RALPH:  Annnnd they were all unwarranted!

DR. FROMM:  I’ve read the reports, Ralph.

RALPH:  Yeah… annnd?

DR. FROMM:  After your last girlfriend broke up with you… you attached yourself to the side of her mobile home for six months.

RALPH: Seven months, but that wasn’t me… that was a bee hive.

DR. FROMM:  It was you.  And then when the girlfriend before that broke up with you… you attached yourself to the top of her SUV for nine months.

RALPH:  Ten months, but that wasn’t me… that was the muffler.

DR. FROMM:  It was you, Ralph.  You!

RALPH:  It was the catalytic converter!

Ralph settles back in his chair, resigned.

DR. FROMM:  Shall I continue?

RALPH:  No… I get it now.  I have to learn to let go.  I have to learn to let… go.

DR. FROMM:  Yessssss, Ralph… yes.  I think you’ve made a real break through this session.

RALPH:  Yes, Dr. Fromm, I feel like a great weight has been lifted off of me.  Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Dr. Fromm looks at his watch.

DR. FROMM:  Well… times up.  I’ll see you next week.

RALPH:  I’m not leaving.

 

THEND

 

 

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