Yesterday, for the first time ever in all recorded history, a junkie, who was nodding off, actually fell over, and down to the ground.

          “I have never seen any thing like this in all of my many decades of studying physics,” said Albert Einstein, who just so happed to be in the area when the junkie went down.  Einstein went on. “I was in Dominic’s… getting a perm, when I heard a sound that was consistent with distortion in the space-time continuum.  I came outside, I saw the subject on the ground – the junkie, and my suspicions were confirmed.”

           No one knows, for sure, how or why junkies can defy the laws of gravity, nodding over, swaying, zombie-like, coming within inches of the ground, but never, ever actually falling down.  Again, Mr. Einstein.  “Usually, the principle of relativity can be extended to gravitational fields, but in the case of the sidewalk junkie, they seem to have an immunity that not even I can explain.”

              Investigative teams from NASA, MIT, and the International Dominos Society, have all tried to figure out how and why the junkie fell down, with no success,

           Once again, Albert Einstein.  “I believe the junkie’s fall was a combination of factors.  First: we must revisit the equation, E = mc squared.  I think the subject fell because he was dancing… and his dancing was so disjointed, so mush – of -mind, uncoordinated, that it broke all the laws of electromagnetic fields. Thus, we must now update our equation from E = mc squared to… E = mc Hammer squared.  Thus, the subject eclipsed all laws of quantum mechanics and went through a WormHole… thus ending up in WormHole Square on this sidewalk.”