Last Tuesday night, at 7:48PM, Fridgita, a local WormHole Square snowwoman, gave birth to a full tray of ice cube babies, with Zeronious, her snowman husband, proudly by her side.

               “It’s a miracle,” Zeronious said.  He went on.  “Because I don’t actually have a penis or testicles.  I mean-I did have male genitalia at one time, but five years ago, I made the tragic mistake of putting a pack of hand warmers in my jock strap during a hockey game.  So, basically, Fridgita and I have never actually had sex.  Well, there was that one time we did that thing with our carrots, but I don’t think that’s how babies are conceived.  And now that I think about it, I was the one more on the receiving end than she was.  Other than that carrots are only good for eyesight.  So, again all I can say is that it must be a miracle!   Then again, there were those times when I saw our next door neighbor, Jack Frost, nipping at her nose… and her earlobes… and her neck… and her belly button… and her… hey, wait a fucking minute here!”

                    Yesterday, Zeronious petitioned to have a paternity test taken to determine if he is the father of the ice cube babies.   Earlier today Zeronious got the results and it was determined that he is the father.

                  “I’m a father!  Carrots… who knew?”